WHEN MAPS CAN BE MISLEADING

We were staying in a campsite on the Rhine River, directly opposite the quite lovely city of Mainz. Doing the usual research I spotted "Wine Capitals of the World - Tourist Information" on my Maps.me app.

This could be good. We were in Mainz for a wine tour so this looked like an opportunity for homework. Plus it was close to the Gutenberg Museum and the Cathedral. Sadly this was all we got.

It seems that Mainz fancies itself as the Wine Capital of Germany. This was tourist information we really didn't need. 

But it was kind of funny walking in circles looking for a building hosting a mine of information and suddenly seeing this sign.

NOW THIS IS HANDY!

How could you resist grabbing a bottle of this? And never letting go. About AUD$16 from Barracuda in the UAE [December 2015]. Turned out to be a very passable Italian Cabernet Sauvignon which would have been outstanding value if the dollar was worth more.

There is also a lean chablis like chardonnay in the range. Not quite as impressive as the cabernet but still very worthwhile.

The Ice Bucket Challenge

Rarely do I succumb to fads, crazes or general Facebook foolishness.
But when your daughter-in-law issues a challenge from the balmy extremes of an English summer how can you refuse?
Even though it's 7pm, late winter in Sydney and a lazy wind is blowing.

Raised a few dollars for our one and only charity Bailey's Childhood Cancer Appeal affiliated with Westmead Children's Hospital

What's the collective noun for a group of wine tasters?

In the middle of a post Christmas 2013 clean up I just came across a battered old Ginger Meggs cartoon by the late great James Kemsley [aka Skeeter]. Now I have no idea why he thought Ginger would contemplate such a question but "What's the collective noun for a group of wine tasters?"

A SPIT

Every home should have one

It's not quite up there with the USB wine stick
http://outstandingwines.blogspot.com.au/2008/11/usb-wine-device.html
which still makes me laugh after all these years, but it still brings a chuckle.
Thanks Tony Freeman.

WHO ARE YOUR FAVOURITE TV FOOD PROGRAMME PRESENTERS?

I vote for Rick Stein and Janella Purcell.
And do you dislike TV cooking competitions as much as I do?

Adventures with Spell Cheque*

I love the spell check tool on my mail programme
Not only does it easily highlight those clumsy little typos but it provides some of the funniest moments in my day.

Usually in the rush to send out a newsletter I skim past the alternative suggestion but when Croser was replaced by CARESSER [wonder what Brian would think of that?] in the recent fizz newsletter I was prompted to record the rest of its suggestions:

BOLLINGER became BLUNGER
CLICQUOT became COLLOQUIQUIA [I kid you not]
HEIDSIECK was replaced by HADES
RUMBALL became RAMBLE
and for some very strange reason it wanted to replace WINERY with WEANERS

* a message to all copy writers on ABC and SMH websites - spell check won't fix their/there or its/it's. Let's all be careful.

The Len Evans Theory of Capacity

I've been carrying an A4 piece of paper with Uncle Len's 10 Commandments around for years. I thought it was worthy of a retype into a more public forum so I can now relax about losing that faded sheet.
What do you reckon?

1,2 and 3 are indisputable. 3 is what keeps me inspired
4 is a bit suss but is saved by linking it with 8. That bottle a day shared with friends is what it's all about.
5 is a truly interesting concept and I'd add people who drink the same wine over and over again.
6 I know these people. It's a glorious obsession that impresses me far more than philately
7. Len wrote this before the era of pre-mixes, but he'd feel the same way about them.
8. This just about sums it up for me and combined with 3 explains why I'm in this business
9 and 10 are both decidedly suss, but to leave them out would be tantamount to censorship and 8 points doesn't quite have the same ring as 10.

The Len Evans Theory of Capacity
1. There is an awful lot of wine in the world, but there is also a lot of awful wine.
2. No sensible person drinks to excess, therefore any one person can only drink a certain amount in a lifetime.
3. There are countless flavours, nuances, shades of wine; endless varieties, regions, styles. You have neither the time nor the capacity to try them all.
4. To make the most of the time left to you, you must start by calculating your future total capacity. One bottle a day is 365 bottles a year. If your life expectancy is another 30 years, there are only 10,000-odd bottles ahead of you.
5. People who say: "You can't drink the good stuff all the time" are talking rubbish. You must drink good stuff all the time. Everytime you drink a bottle of inferior wine, it's like smashing a superior bottle against the wall. The pleasure is lost forever - you can't get that bottle back.
6. There are people who build up huge cellars, most of which they have no hope of drinking. They are foolish in over-estimating their capacity but they err on the right side and their friends love them.
7. There are also people who don't want to drink good wine, and are happy with the cheapies. I forgive them. There are others who are content with beer and spirits. I can't worry about everybody.
8. Wine is not meant to be enjoyed for its own sake; it is the key to love and laughter with friends, to the enjoyment of food, beauty and humour and art and music. Its rewards are far beyond its cost.
9. What part is wine of your life? Ten percentum: Ergo, 10 percent of your income should be spent on wine.
10. The principle should be applied to other phases of life. A disciple kissed a beautiful young lady and she demurred. He was aghast and said "Don't get the wrong idea.I've worked out I can only make love another 1343 times. I'm bloody sure I'm not wasting one on you"

How to open a bottle of wine with a shoe

Now this is totally pointless if you have a screw cap bottle or at the very least a corkscrew. But if, like me, you are caught in Salisbury on a Bank Holiday Sunday with a cork sealed 2008 Bordeaux that you've just grabbed in a last minute rush to Sainsbury's then you may be extremely grateful.
I suppose I could have scrounged a corkscrew from somewhere but this seemed the perfect opportunity to test this little party trick I'd seen. And yes it does work.
A few words of warning though.
The cork's exit speed is much faster in the video than I experienced. Maybe my cork was tighter or I wasn't violent enough. And choose your wall carefully. I recommend a brick external wall with no-one on the other side - otherwise they will come to see what the hell is making the noise and then challenge your sanity.

The USB Wine Device

A very clever man I once worked with had the idea for this 7 years ago. If we'd had the money we'd have launched it the day after March 31, 2001.
Now, sadly the French have beat us to it. Thank god for the Rugby!

RRP: $ PRICELESS
Our Price: $

OUT OF STOCK

Gotham 2006 Coonawarra Cabernet Sauvignon

I may have told you this story before but regardless it's worthy of being told again. Not so long ago a VERY senior winemaker employed by a VERY voluminous producer was asked for the secret of making successful Cabernet Sauvignon. His reply was "Make it taste like Shiraz".
Which goes along way to explaining the long time shortage of finding cabernets that actually taste like the grape from which they were made. I want to taste Cabernets with tannin and acid that ooze blackcurrant. And don't cost the earth.

Last week the Gotham 2006 Coonawarra Cabernet Sauvignon was submitted and it's a cracker. You have no idea [actually you probably do] of how tempted I was to do a "Crazy Coonawarra, Batman" as a heading.. It's a crazy name with one of the wackiest labels we've seen in a longtime and neither do the wine justice. It opens with a fairly overt cool climate nose. There's a fair bit of capsicum and a touch of earthiness which I'm glad disappears within 20 minutes or so. There's none of that on the palate which starts off reasonably subdued and then just blossoms. Wood is there but it's the rich cabernet fruit and acid balance that make this such a top drop. Alcohol is a sensible 13.5% and the winemaker is Peter Douglas which goes a long way to explaining the quality of this wine. We road tested it over 4 days and it just kept on getting better so it's one to consider for the cellar. Very highly recommended.

Our Price: $15 per bottle by the doz

SOLD OUT

Not so enthaicing wine descriptions

Back in 2006 we found ourselves overnighting at the Grand China Princess Hotel in Bangkok. Great hotel with one of those truly inspiring Asian breakfast buffets and a rooftop pool that let you soak in just how huge the city really is.
I borrowed one of their wine lists which I've just come across in an early spring clean.
At around $25 - $50 a bottle these were easy to resist:

Chenin Blanc White Wine 2003
"A medium sweet wine: deep colour, golden, mushroom and fungus on the nose. Enjoy with very hot and spicy seafood, Thai dishes or as a spicy aperitif. Serve well very chilled."

Chenin Blanc Extra Dry 2003
"With a fresh and fragrant bouquet. Typical aged Chenin characteristics on nose and clean fruit on the palate. Perfect with popular fish, seafood Thai dishes."

Shiraz Red Wine 2004
"Light, soft and sweet with a bitter after taste. Oak on the nose and palate with a very light middle palate match perfect with any meat dish or spicy one."

Sparkling Wine De Loei
"Honey nose, very rich on the palate, a very fine mousse on the palate. It is produced firstly by the traditional method " a bottle fermented" and aged nearly two years from the best selection of chenin blanc. Perfect for any occasion and with special house cocktail Thai ingredients (mango or lychee liqueur)"

Witchmount "Scarlett" 2004 Shiraz Cabernet

ONE OF THE SILLIEST WINE LABELS ..... EVER!

We first saw this wine sometime last year. Based on the wholesale price we would have been looking at retailing it for around $20 but the label was so inappropriate that we unanimously declined the offer to taste it.
What a difference a year makes.
We have just bought the last remaining stock and can offer this premium Victorian red for just $10 a bottle. Our opinion of the label hasn't changed. Naked women, even rear views, just aren't appropriate for wine labels and it looks like the market has agreed. [Not sure what the market thought about the Captain Jack chardonnay - yep, a front on male nude]

This is a serious red with a silly label. It's medium weight with 14% alcohol and only 12 months in both French and US oak. Shiraz and cabernet almost seem like an old fashioned blend nowadays but it still works. Both contribute their varietal notes and I reckon it will be drinking at its peak over the next two years.

RRP: $17 - $20
Our Price: $10 per bottle

OUT OF STOCK